Cecil Gershwin Palmer (
goodnightlisteners) wrote in
entranceway2014-12-09 05:53 pm
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[audio] and burbled as it came
[Cecil is pretty used to nightmares, even community-wide nightmares, but this one should probably be addressed.]
Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe. Welcome...to Wonderland.
Hello, listeners. You know, being from Night Vale, I'm sort of an expert on disruptive shared nightmares. They are almost always one or all of three things: a glimpse of future events, an important news broadcast or Sheriff's Secret Police announcement that can't wait until morning, or a friendly reminder that we have all collectively left our ovens on. Since there is still no formal police force around here, let alone a secret one, I think it's fair to say that this one is the first and third things. Do check your ovens regularly, Wonderland! A house fire is very dangerous, expensive and inconvenient.
The holidays are coming, and that means it will have been one year since the ghosts of Christmas future came to warn us about the Jabberwock. For those of you who weren't here for that, or weren't here for the other, more recent reminders, let me fill you in. Basically the Jabberwock is a huuuuge monster of Wonderland that eats everything in its path and acquires the abilities of whatever it eats. So, if it ate toxic waste, it would become a toxic omnivorous monster, and so on. It died long before I arrived here, but apparently it will be coming back to life sometime soon, or perhaps already has. There's a big old scar out on the hills where it died. I suppose that's what we saw in our nightmares. I went out earlier to see if anything had changed, but it looks the same as always. Not that that ever really means anything, right?
Well, we've known about this for awhile, haven't we, listeners? We've known the Jabberwock is coming, we just don't know when. Much like the average person knows that one day they will slough off their mortal coil of flesh and blood and connective tissues, but doesn't know when that day will come. Death, like the tide, taxes, and the Jabberwock, is inevitable. You can't outrun it or reason with it or avoid it. All you can do is prepare yourself for it.
I hope that we have prepared enough, Wonderland. I am not sure that we have. We certainly don't have the Sword, though maybe it's enough that it's not lost anymore? I know there have been plans to trap it or slow it down, but I don't really think any of those plans have actually been put into action. It's hard to prepare for something when you don't know when it's coming. It's hard to stay on guard when all you do is wait and wait. I don't have the answers, listeners. I wish I did. I can't tell you what to do or how to prepare. All I can tell you is to keep an eye out. To be vigilant. To have an escape route. To have an easy way to contact and coordinate with friends and loved ones. And to hold tight to the people you care about. To stay warm as the days grow colder. To drink plenty of hot cocoa. And to enjoy the days here when things aren't terrible. We don't know when those days will end, after all.
Goodnight, Wonderland. I leave you now with...the weather.
Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe. Welcome...to Wonderland.
Hello, listeners. You know, being from Night Vale, I'm sort of an expert on disruptive shared nightmares. They are almost always one or all of three things: a glimpse of future events, an important news broadcast or Sheriff's Secret Police announcement that can't wait until morning, or a friendly reminder that we have all collectively left our ovens on. Since there is still no formal police force around here, let alone a secret one, I think it's fair to say that this one is the first and third things. Do check your ovens regularly, Wonderland! A house fire is very dangerous, expensive and inconvenient.
The holidays are coming, and that means it will have been one year since the ghosts of Christmas future came to warn us about the Jabberwock. For those of you who weren't here for that, or weren't here for the other, more recent reminders, let me fill you in. Basically the Jabberwock is a huuuuge monster of Wonderland that eats everything in its path and acquires the abilities of whatever it eats. So, if it ate toxic waste, it would become a toxic omnivorous monster, and so on. It died long before I arrived here, but apparently it will be coming back to life sometime soon, or perhaps already has. There's a big old scar out on the hills where it died. I suppose that's what we saw in our nightmares. I went out earlier to see if anything had changed, but it looks the same as always. Not that that ever really means anything, right?
Well, we've known about this for awhile, haven't we, listeners? We've known the Jabberwock is coming, we just don't know when. Much like the average person knows that one day they will slough off their mortal coil of flesh and blood and connective tissues, but doesn't know when that day will come. Death, like the tide, taxes, and the Jabberwock, is inevitable. You can't outrun it or reason with it or avoid it. All you can do is prepare yourself for it.
I hope that we have prepared enough, Wonderland. I am not sure that we have. We certainly don't have the Sword, though maybe it's enough that it's not lost anymore? I know there have been plans to trap it or slow it down, but I don't really think any of those plans have actually been put into action. It's hard to prepare for something when you don't know when it's coming. It's hard to stay on guard when all you do is wait and wait. I don't have the answers, listeners. I wish I did. I can't tell you what to do or how to prepare. All I can tell you is to keep an eye out. To be vigilant. To have an escape route. To have an easy way to contact and coordinate with friends and loved ones. And to hold tight to the people you care about. To stay warm as the days grow colder. To drink plenty of hot cocoa. And to enjoy the days here when things aren't terrible. We don't know when those days will end, after all.
Goodnight, Wonderland. I leave you now with...the weather.
Audio
[She gasps, reminded of something.]
Oh! Um, monsters attacked once before though, and we used the diner as a shelter! It worked pretty well, and there's food and water there too. If the Jabberwocky attacks, maybe it could be used as a safe place again!
Audio
Audio
I-I could try! I wonder what would make good bait though? It seems like...like the Jabberwocky eats most things, so. Hm....
Audio
[Wow.]
Audio
[She's clearly hesitant, as the entire idea disturbs her a little, but she suspects it would be rude to say so.]
I'll be making cake anyway for the Christmas party, so there will be plenty if it wants some!
Audio
...What kind of cake will it be?
Audio
[She has absolutely no idea.]
Audio
But that cake sounds wonderful! I'm really looking forward to it.
Audio
[That way they don't have to think about how it would probably prefer a people cake.]
I'm glad you're looking forward to the party cake though! Are you coming again this year then? We'd love to have you!
Audio
Oh, I'm definitely coming! I mean...assuming we're not all dead or something by then.
Audio
[She's not sure she feels good about trying to poison anything, but she really doesn't know how it works. Would that really happen if it ate a dog? Hm.
She definitely doesn't feel good about the possibility of everyone being dead though.]
I...I really hope we're not! Ha... [She laughs nervously, but she's going to be fretting about it for a long time now.]
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